Wait, I can go to sleep on my own?!?!….zzzzz
Today I want to share our sleep training experience. Although some of the books I read disagree, I think that there is no universal “right way” to teach your child to sleep. I do however think that sleeping is a skill that must be taught in whatever way works for baby and parents. Before I go into our sleep training journey, here is a quick video tutorial for the Infant Optics Video Monitor, which was an absolute LIFESAVER in this process:
I highly encourage you to leave a comment, resource, tip, or story at the end of this blog post because when I was sleep-deprived and googling “willI ever sleep again??”, I took the most comfort from sites where moms shared their common stories and struggles as well as some possible solutions. Anyway, on with it!
At the beginning: From the first day, we used the strategies in The Happiest Baby on the Block (Click here for my full Review and Tutorial) and Miles slept for long stretches all swaddled up, pacifiered and happy.
After he was a few weeks old, I started using The Baby Whisperer’s Easy Plan, which in a nut shell means: Eat (Feed Baby), Activity (Make Eye Contact with Mom, Go for a Walk, Lay on the mat gym, etc), Sleep (Self-Explanitory, but they all had parentheses hehe), Your Time (Mom gets to go pee and rinse off the spit up). We repeated this EASY plan every 3-4 hours and he put himself on to a fairly regular day time schedule. Please note, he did not cry for food between bottles otherwise I would have fed him! Schedules must take into account baby’s needs!
Besides EASY, the two most important lessons I learned from The Baby Whisperer were:
- Lay the baby down drowsy but awake! This lays the foundation for learning to be comfortable in a bed and put themselves to sleep, a very valuable skill a few months down the line!
- Start as you mean to go on. When times got tough, I abandoned this advice and later realized it was the worst thing I could have done at the time. She says over and over in her book, if you don’t want to be walking/bouncing/co-sleeping/etc with your 2 year old, don’t start it with your 6 month old.
Sleeping Like an Angel…Sometimes
- He became increasingly attached to his pacifier. Where before he just needed it to get to sleep initially, now he needed me to get up, go down the hall, and pop it back in every hour or two. I tried everything to get him to figure it out without me.
- He needed me to bounce him to sleep on the yoga ball and it started taking longer and longer to get him to the drowsy, but awake and willing to let me put him down without screaming his head off. (I heard the Baby Whisperer in the back of my head, but I didn’t listen).
- Weaned the pacifier, cold turkey.
- Watched the SleepEasy Solution DVD and followed their system religiously (which involves crying, sigh). The video monitor was a big help!
- Implemented a strict bedtime routine: PJs, bottle (until he weaned that too), story, special song, hug his lovey, sleep.
Consistency is Key
What are your slept training secrets, tips, struggles or stories?
{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }
Always love your posts babe. I didn’t want Anthony to cry it out either, but he left me no choice. I actually forget when we started (that’s bad, right?) But after a few nights, the third night being the worst, I never thought he would stop crying. I cried afraid that he though I abandoned him, but then he realized it was bed time and felt straight to sleep.
Fast forward, he is very territorial of his crib and bedroom. Now at three years old, I have to knock before I get him in the morning and nap time. He had a fit that I “woke him up”. So when he calls for me I have to knock and ask if I can come in. Hard to believe this is the same boy who had to be rocked to sleep, LOL
karen recently posted..All out of flour
Haha! I love to hear about kids quirks. So cute that he needs you to announce yourself. <3
I have no advice. Neither of mine slept through the night until they were 16 months old (and they are 16 months apart – do the math).
I can promise you we tried everything. None of it worked.
Eventually, bedtime became a non issue. They now go willingly.
Just like with potty training, they were on their own schedule. Eventually, it happened because THEY decided it was time.
susan recently posted..Hard Boiled Eggs-pirmentation again. I can’t stop myself
I’m glad to hear they go willingly now. I think I would have lost my mind (even more than I have) if I didn’t get a good night sleep for 2 and a half years! You’re my hero.
I’ve never had kids, but I had plenty of kids who wouldn’t sleep on babysitting gigs. I’ve heard great things about the baby whisperer’s routine from my mom friends!
Blond Duck recently posted..The Original Babies
I’m glad you found something that’s working for you. And that you realize things will change and you’re likely to have to try something new. As the mother of five kids, 14 and up, that’s one thing that’s for sure. Things will change. What works now will quit working. It always does. But it sounds like you’re ready to roll with it and figure it out again. Best wishes!
Stopping by from SITS. Happy Sharefest. I hope you have a wonderful weekend.
misssrobin recently posted..I Can Strengthen
Thanks for the perspective! That mantra is true in life, dieting, and raising kids. It’s the journey not the destination right?
Ah, sleep. It’s so different for each kid. Some are just good sleepers, some are not. Like my first son. He’s 2 1/2 now and sleeps great for his nap (1-2 hours a day) and he sleeps through the night (about 10 hours). But it took some getting to. We co-slept (and breastfed) for the first 18 months, which did NOT work so well after a while because he was using me and the boob as a sleep prop, and even after he turned 1, he was still waking up every 90 minutes to 2 hours EVERY SINGLE NIGHT. It was exhausting for everyone.
Finally, when he finally weaned off breastfeeding, we moved him to his own bed and room at the same time. After a week, he was sleeping through the night! My husband had to step in to do bedtime, as my son would want me to climb into bed with him. He basically stayed with him til he was asleep, then to when he was drowsy. Now, he does the bedtime routine and leaves him awake. He then goes to sleep on his own.
Now that my 2nd is 3 months old, I’m determined to start us off well. So he’s sleeping in his own crib (in my room) and he’s a great sleeper. He still wakes up every 3-4 hours to feed, but he mostly self-soothes throughout the day for his naps. He does use the pacifier, which is worrying, but I’d rather that than him sucking his thumb, which he still tries! I figure when he’s a little older, I can worry about weaning him off that.
Sorry about the whole blog post in your comments!
Stopping by from SITS Sharefest.
Alison recently posted..Turning Back Time
It is s true that every kid has their own sleep personality! I think it is important for parents to make conscious decisions about supporting healthy sleep habits, but be flexible enough to understand their baby’s needs and temperament. Good luck with #2.
{Kathy} Everything you have mentioned does indeed “work”. However, I found that each of my four kids was so different. I was different, too. The equation of temperament plus mommy’s willingness to try certain tactics seems to equal something that eventually made everyone happy. As they have gotten older and older, (18,17,12 and 9) I have noticed a keen similarity between how they were as infants/toddlers and how they are now.
Mothering From Scratch recently posted..momtor monday: finding the bliss in motherhood
Too true! That is exactly the conclusion that I came to; there are so many variables that we have to stay flexible!
Sounds like it took a lot of hard work, but well worth it. My daughter’s sleep patterns were always changing, and a lot of it was common sense that didn’t kick in with me. She didn’t take most of her naps when she was 2-5 months old. But that was because I waited until she was falling asleep. I never tried just putting her in her bed and letting her whine a little. That worked perfectly and all of a sudden I had a baby taking two naps a day. Baby sleep patterns can be so complicated.
Nessa recently posted..Summer Fun for the Kiddos
Yup, it seems like as soon as we figure it out, they change and prove us wrong! We’ve been in a good pattern for a while now, so I’m wondering if it is the calm before the storm…
Sounds like lots of us were sleep training this summer! Great synopsis of your experience. Sleep Training is HARD.
Kerrie recently posted..Toddler Sleep Training Week 3
Amen!